7e3afbba |
1 | %{ |
2 | /* |
3 | * Lex filter to transform plain English into Jive English. |
4 | * No racial or societal slurs are intended. For amusement only. |
5 | * |
6 | * Copyright 1986 by Daniel Klein and Clement Cole. |
7 | * |
8 | * Reproduction permitted so long as this notice is retained. |
9 | */ |
10 | %} |
11 | %e 1700 |
12 | %p 4000 |
13 | %n 700 |
14 | %k 450 |
15 | %a 1700 |
16 | %o 1500 |
17 | BW [ \t\(] |
18 | EW [ \t.,;!\?$\)] |
19 | %% |
20 | @[Bb]egin(.*) | |
21 | ".so ".*$ printf("%s", yytext); |
22 | {BW}send printf("%ct'row",yytext[0]); |
23 | program+ printf("honky code"); |
24 | [Uu]nix printf("slow mo-fo"); |
25 | UNIX printf("dat slow mo-fo"); |
26 | actual printf("ak'shul"); |
27 | {BW}take printf("%csnatch",yytext[0]); |
28 | {BW}took | |
29 | {BW}take[ns] printf("%csnatch'd",yytext[0]); |
30 | [Mm]exican printf("%cet-back", caseify('w')); |
31 | [Ii]talian printf("%creaser", caseify('g')); |
32 | {BW}big{EW} { printf("%cbig ass",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
33 | fool printf("honkyfool"); |
34 | modem printf("doodad"); |
35 | {BW}he{EW} { printf("%cmah' man he",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
36 | "e the"{EW} | |
37 | "a the"{EW} | |
38 | "t the"{EW} | |
39 | "d the"{EW} { printf("%c da damn", yytext[0]);plastc();} |
40 | wife | |
41 | woman printf("mama"); |
42 | girl printf("goat"); |
43 | something printf("sump'n"); |
44 | {BW}lie printf("%chonky jive",yytext[0]); |
45 | -o- printf("-on rebound-"); |
46 | [a-z]"." { printf("%s", yytext);expletive();} |
47 | ! printf(". Right On!"); |
48 | [Ss]ure printf("%cho'", yytext[0]); |
49 | get printf("git"); |
50 | "will have"{EW} | |
51 | "will"{EW} | |
52 | "got to"{EW} { printf("gots'ta");plastc();} |
53 | "I am" printf("I's gots'ta be"); |
54 | "aren't" | |
55 | "am not" | |
56 | "have not" | |
57 | "is not" | |
58 | "are not" printf("ain't"); |
59 | {BW}see{EW} { printf("%csee's",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
60 | {BW}are{EW} { printf("%cis",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
61 | {BW}hat{EW} { printf("%cfedora",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
62 | {BW}shoe printf("%ckicker",yytext[0]); |
63 | {BW}"have to"{EW} | |
64 | {BW}has{EW} { printf("%cgots'ta",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
65 | have printf("gots'"); |
66 | {BW}go{EW} | |
67 | {BW}"come over"{EW} | |
68 | {BW}come{EW} { printf("%cmosey on down",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
69 | buy printf("steal"); |
70 | {BW}car{EW} { printf("%cwheels",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
71 | drive printf("roll"); |
72 | {BW}food printf("%ccatfish an' colluhd greens",yytext[0]); |
73 | {BW}eat{EW} { printf("%cfeed da bud",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
74 | drink printf("guzzle"); |
75 | black | |
76 | negro printf("brother"); |
77 | white printf("honky"); |
78 | nigger printf("gentleman"); |
79 | nice printf("supa' fine"); |
80 | {BW}person printf("%csucka'",yytext[0]); |
81 | [Pp]eople printf("%cucka's", caseify('s')); |
82 | {BW}thing thing(yytext[0]); |
83 | house{EW} { printf("crib");plastc();} |
84 | home printf("plantation"); |
85 | name printf("dojigger"); |
86 | {BW}path printf("%calley",yytext[0]); |
87 | [Cc]omputer printf("%clunker", yytext[0]); |
88 | or printf("o'"); |
89 | president printf("super-dude"); |
90 | "prime minister" printf("prahm mistah"); |
91 | government printf("guv'ment"); |
92 | knew printf("knowed"); |
93 | [Bb]ecause printf("'%cuz", caseify('c')); |
94 | [Yy]our printf("%co'", yytext[0]); |
95 | [Ff]our printf("%coe", yytext[0]); |
96 | got printf("gots"); |
97 | young printf("yung"); |
98 | you printf("ya'"); |
99 | You printf("You's"); |
100 | first printf("fust"); |
101 | police printf("honky pigs"); |
102 | {BW}string printf("%cchittlin'",yytext[0]); |
103 | {BW}read printf("%ceyeball",yytext[0]); |
104 | write printf("scribble"); |
105 | think{EW} { printf("thin'");plastc();} |
106 | with printf("wif"); |
107 | other printf("uthu'"); |
108 | [Tt]hr printf("%c'r", yytext[0]); |
109 | [Tt]h printf("%c", caseify('d')); |
110 | ing printf("in'"); |
111 | {BW}a{EW} { printf("%csome",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
112 | {BW}to{EW} { printf("%ct'",yytext[0]); |
113 | if(yytext[yyleng-1]!=' ') |
114 | plastc(); |
115 | } |
116 | tion printf("shun"); |
117 | [Aa]lmost printf("%cos'", caseify('m')); |
118 | from printf("fum"); |
119 | [Yy]"ou're" printf("%couse", yytext[0]); |
120 | alright | |
121 | okay printf("coo'"); |
122 | [Aa]nd printf("%cn'", yytext[0]); |
123 | known printf("knode"); |
124 | want printf("wants'"); |
125 | beat printf("whup'ed"); |
126 | ile printf("ah'l"); |
127 | er{EW} { printf("uh");plastc();} |
128 | [a-z]sti printf("%cs'i", yytext[0]); |
129 | tute printf("toot"); |
130 | exp printf("'sp"); |
131 | exs | |
132 | exc printf("'s"); |
133 | {BW}ex printf("%c'es",yytext[0]); |
134 | [ae]ct{EW} { printf("%cc'", yytext[0]); plastc(); } |
135 | like printf("likes"); |
136 | done | |
137 | did printf("dun did"); |
138 | "kind of" printf("kind'a"); |
139 | women printf("honky chicks"); |
140 | {BW}man{EW} { printf("%cdude",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
141 | {BW}men{EW} | |
142 | {BW}mens{EW} { printf("%cdudes",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
143 | injured printf("hosed"); |
144 | killed | |
145 | dead printf("wasted"); |
146 | good printf("baaaad"); |
147 | open{EW} { printf("jimmey");plastc();} |
148 | opened{EW} { printf("jimmey'd");plastc();} |
149 | {BW}very printf("%creal",yytext[0]); |
150 | per printf("puh'"); |
151 | oar printf("o'"); |
152 | {BW}can printf("%ckin",yytext[0]); |
153 | {BW}just{EW} { printf("%cplum",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
154 | [Dd]etroit printf("Mo-town"); |
155 | [Ww]"estern "[Ee]"lectric" printf("da' cave"); |
156 | {BW}believe printf("%crecon'",yytext[0]); |
157 | [Ii]"ndianapolis" printf("Nap-town"); |
158 | Daniel | |
159 | Dan printf("Liva' Lips"); |
160 | Reagan printf("Kingfish"); |
161 | Ronald{EW} | |
162 | Ron{EW} { printf("Rolo");plastc();} |
163 | John printf("Rastus"); |
164 | Jim printf("Bo-Jangles"); |
165 | pontiff | |
166 | pope printf("wiz'"); |
167 | [Pp]ravda printf("dat commie rag"); |
168 | broken printf("bugger'd"); |
169 | strange{EW} { printf("funky");plastc();} |
170 | dance{EW} { printf("boogy");plastc();} |
171 | ask printf("ax'"); |
172 | {BW}so{EW} { printf("%cso's",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
173 | heard printf("'hoid"); |
174 | head printf("'haid"); |
175 | boss printf("main man"); |
176 | money printf("bre'd"); |
177 | [a-z]":" { *(yytext+1) = ','; |
178 | printf("%s dig dis:",yytext); |
179 | } |
180 | amateur printf("begina'"); |
181 | radio printf("transista'"); |
182 | {BW}of{EW} { printf("%cuh",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
183 | which | |
184 | what printf("whut"); |
185 | "don't" printf("doan'"); |
186 | does printf("duz"); |
187 | {BW}was{EW} | |
188 | {BW}were{EW} { printf("%cwuz",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
189 | {BW}understand printf("%cdig",yytext[0]); |
190 | {BW}my printf("%cmah'",yytext[0]); |
191 | again | |
192 | against printf("agin'"); |
193 | {BW}[Ii]{EW} { printf("%cah'",yytext[0]);plastc();} |
194 | meta printf("meta-fuckin'"); |
195 | cally printf("c'l"); |
196 | %% |
197 | plastc() |
198 | { |
199 | unput(yytext[yyleng-1]); |
200 | } |
201 | |
202 | caseify(c) |
203 | char c; |
204 | { |
205 | if (yytext[0] <= 'Z') |
206 | return (c - ' '); |
207 | else |
208 | return (c); |
209 | } |
210 | |
211 | thing(c) |
212 | char c; |
213 | { |
214 | static short count = 0; |
215 | |
216 | putchar(c); |
217 | switch (count++ % 4) { |
218 | case 0: case 2: |
219 | printf("thang"); |
220 | break; |
221 | case 1: |
222 | printf("doohickey"); |
223 | break; |
224 | case 3: |
225 | printf("wahtahmellun"); |
226 | break; |
227 | } |
228 | } |
229 | expletive() |
230 | { |
231 | static short count = 0; |
232 | static short which = 0; |
233 | |
234 | if (count++ % 4 == 0) { |
235 | switch (which++ % 5) { |
236 | case 0: printf(" What it is, Mama!"); break; |
237 | case 1: printf(" Ya' know?"); break; |
238 | case 2: printf(" Sheeeiit."); break; |
239 | case 3: printf(" Ya' dig?"); break; |
240 | case 4: printf(" Git down!"); break; |
241 | } |
242 | } |
243 | } |
244 | |
245 | /* |
246 | * Bugs: |
247 | * |
248 | * If a sentence starts with a keyword it doan' get converted, or: |
249 | * it do, but gets a leading space |
250 | */ |