[filters.git] / jive.l

%{
/*
 *	Lex filter to transform plain English into Jive English.
 *	No racial or societal slurs are intended.  For amusement only.
 *
 *	Copyright 1986 by Daniel Klein and Clement Cole.
 *
 *	Reproduction permitted so long as this notice is retained.
 */
%}
%e 1700
%p 4000
%n 700
%k 450
%a 1700
%o 1500
BW [ \t\(]
EW [ \t.,;!\?$\)]
%%
@[Bb]egin(.*)		|
".so ".*$			printf("%s", yytext);
{BW}send			printf("%ct'row",yytext[0]);
program+			printf("honky code");
[Uu]nix				printf("slow mo-fo");
UNIX				printf("dat slow mo-fo");
actual				printf("ak'shul");
{BW}take			printf("%csnatch",yytext[0]);
{BW}took		|
{BW}take[ns]			printf("%csnatch'd",yytext[0]);
[Mm]exican			printf("%cet-back", caseify('w'));
[Ii]talian			printf("%creaser", caseify('g'));
{BW}big{EW}		{	printf("%cbig ass",yytext[0]);plastc();}
fool				printf("honkyfool");
modem				printf("doodad");
{BW}he{EW}		{	printf("%cmah' man he",yytext[0]);plastc();}
"e the"{EW}		|
"a the"{EW}		|
"t the"{EW}		|
"d the"{EW}		{	printf("%c da damn", yytext[0]);plastc();}
wife			|
woman				printf("mama");
girl				printf("goat");
something			printf("sump'n");
{BW}lie				printf("%chonky jive",yytext[0]);
-o-                     	printf("-on rebound-");
[a-z]"."		{	printf("%s", yytext);expletive();}
!                       	printf(".  Right On!");
[Ss]ure				printf("%cho'", yytext[0]);
get				printf("git");
"will have"{EW}		|
"will"{EW}		|
"got to"{EW}		{	printf("gots'ta");plastc();}
"I am"				printf("I's gots'ta be");
"aren't"		|
"am not"		|
"have not"		|
"is not"		|
"are not"			printf("ain't");
{BW}see{EW}		{	printf("%csee's",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}are{EW}		{	printf("%cis",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}hat{EW}		{	printf("%cfedora",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}shoe			printf("%ckicker",yytext[0]);
{BW}"have to"{EW}	|
{BW}has{EW}		{	printf("%cgots'ta",yytext[0]);plastc();}
have				printf("gots'");
{BW}go{EW}		|
{BW}"come over"{EW}	|
{BW}come{EW}            {       printf("%cmosey on down",yytext[0]);plastc();}
buy				printf("steal");
{BW}car{EW}             {	printf("%cwheels",yytext[0]);plastc();}
drive				printf("roll");
{BW}food			printf("%ccatfish an' colluhd greens",yytext[0]);
{BW}eat{EW}		{	printf("%cfeed da bud",yytext[0]);plastc();}
drink				printf("guzzle");
black			|
negro				printf("brother");
white 				printf("honky");
nigger				printf("gentleman");
nice				printf("supa' fine");
{BW}person			printf("%csucka'",yytext[0]);
[Pp]eople			printf("%cucka's", caseify('s'));
{BW}thing			thing(yytext[0]);
house{EW}		{	printf("crib");plastc();}
home				printf("plantation");
name				printf("dojigger");
{BW}path			printf("%calley",yytext[0]);
[Cc]omputer			printf("%clunker", yytext[0]);
or				printf("o'");
president			printf("super-dude");
"prime minister"		printf("prahm mistah");
government			printf("guv'ment");
knew				printf("knowed");
[Bb]ecause			printf("'%cuz", caseify('c'));
[Yy]our				printf("%co'", yytext[0]);
[Ff]our				printf("%coe", yytext[0]);
got				printf("gots");
young				printf("yung");
you				printf("ya'");
You				printf("You's");
first				printf("fust");
police				printf("honky pigs");
{BW}string			printf("%cchittlin'",yytext[0]);
{BW}read			printf("%ceyeball",yytext[0]);
write				printf("scribble");
think{EW}		{	printf("thin'");plastc();}
with				printf("wif");
other				printf("uthu'");
[Tt]hr				printf("%c'r", yytext[0]);
[Tt]h				printf("%c", caseify('d'));
ing				printf("in'");
{BW}a{EW}		{	printf("%csome",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}to{EW}		{	printf("%ct'",yytext[0]);
				if(yytext[yyleng-1]!=' ')
					plastc();
			}
tion				printf("shun");
[Aa]lmost			printf("%cos'", caseify('m'));
from				printf("fum");
[Yy]"ou're"			printf("%couse", yytext[0]);
alright			|
okay				printf("coo'");
[Aa]nd				printf("%cn'", yytext[0]);
known				printf("knode");
want				printf("wants'");
beat				printf("whup'ed");
ile				printf("ah'l");
er{EW}			{	printf("uh");plastc();}
[a-z]sti			printf("%cs'i", yytext[0]);
tute				printf("toot");
exp				printf("'sp");
exs			|
exc				printf("'s");
{BW}ex				printf("%c'es",yytext[0]);
[ae]ct{EW}		{	printf("%cc'", yytext[0]); plastc(); }
like				printf("likes");
done			|
did				printf("dun did");
"kind of"			printf("kind'a");
women				printf("honky chicks");
{BW}man{EW}		{	printf("%cdude",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}men{EW}		|
{BW}mens{EW}		{	printf("%cdudes",yytext[0]);plastc();}
injured				printf("hosed");
killed			|
dead				printf("wasted");
good				printf("baaaad");
open{EW}		{	printf("jimmey");plastc();}
opened{EW}		{	printf("jimmey'd");plastc();}
{BW}very			printf("%creal",yytext[0]);
per				printf("puh'");
oar				printf("o'");
{BW}can				printf("%ckin",yytext[0]);
{BW}just{EW}		{	printf("%cplum",yytext[0]);plastc();}
[Dd]etroit			printf("Mo-town");
[Ww]"estern "[Ee]"lectric"	printf("da' cave");
{BW}believe			printf("%crecon'",yytext[0]);
[Ii]"ndianapolis"		printf("Nap-town");
Daniel			|
Dan				printf("Liva' Lips");
Reagan				printf("Kingfish");
Ronald{EW}		|
Ron{EW}			{	printf("Rolo");plastc();}
John				printf("Rastus");
Jim				printf("Bo-Jangles");
pontiff			|
pope				printf("wiz'");
[Pp]ravda			printf("dat commie rag");
broken				printf("bugger'd");
strange{EW}		{	printf("funky");plastc();}
dance{EW}		{	printf("boogy");plastc();}
ask				printf("ax'");
{BW}so{EW}		{	printf("%cso's",yytext[0]);plastc();}
heard				printf("'hoid");
head				printf("'haid");
boss				printf("main man");
money				printf("bre'd");
[a-z]":"		{	*(yytext+1) = ',';
				printf("%s dig dis:",yytext);
			}
amateur				printf("begina'");
radio				printf("transista'");
{BW}of{EW}		{	printf("%cuh",yytext[0]);plastc();}
which			|
what				printf("whut");
"don't"				printf("doan'");
does				printf("duz");
{BW}was{EW}		|
{BW}were{EW}		{	printf("%cwuz",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}understand			printf("%cdig",yytext[0]);
{BW}my				printf("%cmah'",yytext[0]);
again			|
against				printf("agin'");
{BW}[Ii]{EW}		{	printf("%cah'",yytext[0]);plastc();}
meta				printf("meta-fuckin'");
cally				printf("c'l");
%%
plastc()
{
	unput(yytext[yyleng-1]);
}

caseify(c)
char c;
{
	if (yytext[0] <= 'Z')
		return (c - ' ');
	else
		return (c);
}

thing(c)
char c;
{
	static short	count = 0;

	putchar(c);
	switch (count++ % 4) {
		case 0: case 2:
			printf("thang");
			break;
		case 1:
			printf("doohickey");
			break;
		case 3:
			printf("wahtahmellun");
			break;
		}
}
expletive()
{
	static short	count = 0;
	static short	which = 0;

	if (count++ % 4 == 0) {
		switch (which++ % 5) {
			case 0: printf("  What it is, Mama!"); break;
			case 1: printf("  Ya' know?"); break;
			case 2: printf("  Sheeeiit."); break;
			case 3: printf("  Ya' dig?"); break;
			case 4: printf("  Git down!"); break;
			}
		}
}

/*
 * Bugs:
 *
 * If a sentence starts with a keyword it doan' get converted, or:
 * it do, but gets a leading space
 */
Commit	Line	Data
dc17484a	1	%{
	2	/*
	3	* Lex filter to transform plain English into Jive English.
	4	* No racial or societal slurs are intended. For amusement only.
	5	*
	6	* Copyright 1986 by Daniel Klein and Clement Cole.
	7	*
	8	* Reproduction permitted so long as this notice is retained.
	9	*/
	10	%}
	11	%e 1700
	12	%p 4000
	13	%n 700
	14	%k 450
	15	%a 1700
	16	%o 1500
	17	BW [ \t\(]
	18	EW [ \t.,;!\?$\)]
	19	%%
	20	@[Bb]egin(.*) \|
	21	".so ".*$ printf("%s", yytext);
	22	{BW}send printf("%ct'row",yytext[0]);
	23	program+ printf("honky code");
	24	[Uu]nix printf("slow mo-fo");
	25	UNIX printf("dat slow mo-fo");
	26	actual printf("ak'shul");
	27	{BW}take printf("%csnatch",yytext[0]);
	28	{BW}took \|
	29	{BW}take[ns] printf("%csnatch'd",yytext[0]);
	30	[Mm]exican printf("%cet-back", caseify('w'));
	31	[Ii]talian printf("%creaser", caseify('g'));
	32	{BW}big{EW} { printf("%cbig ass",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	33	fool printf("honkyfool");
	34	modem printf("doodad");
	35	{BW}he{EW} { printf("%cmah' man he",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	36	"e the"{EW} \|
	37	"a the"{EW} \|
	38	"t the"{EW} \|
	39	"d the"{EW} { printf("%c da damn", yytext[0]);plastc();}
	40	wife \|
	41	woman printf("mama");
	42	girl printf("goat");
	43	something printf("sump'n");
	44	{BW}lie printf("%chonky jive",yytext[0]);
	45	-o- printf("-on rebound-");
	46	[a-z]"." { printf("%s", yytext);expletive();}
	47	! printf(". Right On!");
	48	[Ss]ure printf("%cho'", yytext[0]);
	49	get printf("git");
	50	"will have"{EW} \|
	51	"will"{EW} \|
	52	"got to"{EW} { printf("gots'ta");plastc();}
	53	"I am" printf("I's gots'ta be");
	54	"aren't" \|
	55	"am not" \|
	56	"have not" \|
	57	"is not" \|
	58	"are not" printf("ain't");
	59	{BW}see{EW} { printf("%csee's",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	60	{BW}are{EW} { printf("%cis",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	61	{BW}hat{EW} { printf("%cfedora",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	62	{BW}shoe printf("%ckicker",yytext[0]);
	63	{BW}"have to"{EW} \|
	64	{BW}has{EW} { printf("%cgots'ta",yytext[0]);plastc();}
65	have printf("gots'");
66	{BW}go{EW} \|
67	{BW}"come over"{EW} \|
68	{BW}come{EW} { printf("%cmosey on down",yytext[0]);plastc();}
69	buy printf("steal");
70	{BW}car{EW} { printf("%cwheels",yytext[0]);plastc();}
71	drive printf("roll");
72	{BW}food printf("%ccatfish an' colluhd greens",yytext[0]);
73	{BW}eat{EW} { printf("%cfeed da bud",yytext[0]);plastc();}
74	drink printf("guzzle");
75	black \|
76	negro printf("brother");
77	white printf("honky");
78	nigger printf("gentleman");
79	nice printf("supa' fine");
80	{BW}person printf("%csucka'",yytext[0]);
81	[Pp]eople printf("%cucka's", caseify('s'));
82	{BW}thing thing(yytext[0]);
83	house{EW} { printf("crib");plastc();}
84	home printf("plantation");
85	name printf("dojigger");
86	{BW}path printf("%calley",yytext[0]);
87	[Cc]omputer printf("%clunker", yytext[0]);
88	or printf("o'");
89	president printf("super-dude");
90	"prime minister" printf("prahm mistah");
91	government printf("guv'ment");
92	knew printf("knowed");
93	[Bb]ecause printf("'%cuz", caseify('c'));
94	[Yy]our printf("%co'", yytext[0]);
95	[Ff]our printf("%coe", yytext[0]);
96	got printf("gots");
97	young printf("yung");
98	you printf("ya'");
99	You printf("You's");
100	first printf("fust");
101	police printf("honky pigs");
102	{BW}string printf("%cchittlin'",yytext[0]);
103	{BW}read printf("%ceyeball",yytext[0]);
104	write printf("scribble");
105	think{EW} { printf("thin'");plastc();}
106	with printf("wif");
107	other printf("uthu'");
108	[Tt]hr printf("%c'r", yytext[0]);
109	[Tt]h printf("%c", caseify('d'));
110	ing printf("in'");
111	{BW}a{EW} { printf("%csome",yytext[0]);plastc();}
112	{BW}to{EW} { printf("%ct'",yytext[0]);
113	if(yytext[yyleng-1]!=' ')
114	plastc();
115	}
116	tion printf("shun");
117	[Aa]lmost printf("%cos'", caseify('m'));
118	from printf("fum");
119	[Yy]"ou're" printf("%couse", yytext[0]);
120	alright \|
121	okay printf("coo'");
122	[Aa]nd printf("%cn'", yytext[0]);
123	known printf("knode");
124	want printf("wants'");
125	beat printf("whup'ed");
126	ile printf("ah'l");
127	er{EW} { printf("uh");plastc();}
128	[a-z]sti printf("%cs'i", yytext[0]);
129	tute printf("toot");
130	exp printf("'sp");
131	exs \|
132	exc printf("'s");
133	{BW}ex printf("%c'es",yytext[0]);
134	[ae]ct{EW} { printf("%cc'", yytext[0]); plastc(); }
135	like printf("likes");
136	done \|
137	did printf("dun did");
138	"kind of" printf("kind'a");
139	women printf("honky chicks");
140	{BW}man{EW} { printf("%cdude",yytext[0]);plastc();}
141	{BW}men{EW} \|
142	{BW}mens{EW} { printf("%cdudes",yytext[0]);plastc();}
143	injured printf("hosed");
144	killed \|
145	dead printf("wasted");
146	good printf("baaaad");
147	open{EW} { printf("jimmey");plastc();}
148	opened{EW} { printf("jimmey'd");plastc();}
149	{BW}very printf("%creal",yytext[0]);
150	per printf("puh'");
151	oar printf("o'");
152	{BW}can printf("%ckin",yytext[0]);
153	{BW}just{EW} { printf("%cplum",yytext[0]);plastc();}
154	[Dd]etroit printf("Mo-town");
155	[Ww]"estern "[Ee]"lectric" printf("da' cave");
156	{BW}believe printf("%crecon'",yytext[0]);
157	[Ii]"ndianapolis" printf("Nap-town");
158	Daniel \|
159	Dan printf("Liva' Lips");
160	Reagan printf("Kingfish");
161	Ronald{EW} \|
162	Ron{EW} { printf("Rolo");plastc();}
163	John printf("Rastus");
164	Jim printf("Bo-Jangles");
165	pontiff \|
166	pope printf("wiz'");
167	[Pp]ravda printf("dat commie rag");
168	broken printf("bugger'd");
169	strange{EW} { printf("funky");plastc();}
170	dance{EW} { printf("boogy");plastc();}
171	ask printf("ax'");
172	{BW}so{EW} { printf("%cso's",yytext[0]);plastc();}
173	heard printf("'hoid");
174	head printf("'haid");
175	boss printf("main man");
176	money printf("bre'd");
177	[a-z]":" { *(yytext+1) = ',';
178	printf("%s dig dis:",yytext);
179	}
180	amateur printf("begina'");
181	radio printf("transista'");
182	{BW}of{EW} { printf("%cuh",yytext[0]);plastc();}
183	which \|
184	what printf("whut");
185	"don't" printf("doan'");
186	does printf("duz");
187	{BW}was{EW} \|
188	{BW}were{EW} { printf("%cwuz",yytext[0]);plastc();}
189	{BW}understand printf("%cdig",yytext[0]);
190	{BW}my printf("%cmah'",yytext[0]);
191	again \|
192	against printf("agin'");
193	{BW}[Ii]{EW} { printf("%cah'",yytext[0]);plastc();}
194	meta printf("meta-fuckin'");
195	cally printf("c'l");
196	%%
197	plastc()
198	{
199	unput(yytext[yyleng-1]);
200	}
201
202	caseify(c)
203	char c;
204	{
205	if (yytext[0] <= 'Z')
206	return (c - ' ');
207	else
208	return (c);
209	}
210
211	thing(c)
212	char c;
213	{
214	static short count = 0;
215
216	putchar(c);
217	switch (count++ % 4) {
218	case 0: case 2:
219	printf("thang");
220	break;
221	case 1:
222	printf("doohickey");
223	break;
224	case 3:
225	printf("wahtahmellun");
226	break;
227	}
228	}
229	expletive()
230	{
231	static short count = 0;
232	static short which = 0;
233
234	if (count++ % 4 == 0) {
235	switch (which++ % 5) {
236	case 0: printf(" What it is, Mama!"); break;
237	case 1: printf(" Ya' know?"); break;
238	case 2: printf(" Sheeeiit."); break;
239	case 3: printf(" Ya' dig?"); break;
240	case 4: printf(" Git down!"); break;
241	}
242	}
243	}
244
245	/*
246	* Bugs:
247	*
248	* If a sentence starts with a keyword it doan' get converted, or:
249	* it do, but gets a leading space
250	*/