[filters.git] / jive.l

%{
/*
 *	Lex filter to transform plain English into Jive English.
 *	No racial or societal slurs are intended.  For amusement only.
 *
 *	Copyright 1986 by Daniel Klein and Clement Cole.
 *
 *	Reproduction permitted so long as this notice is retained.
 */

%}
%e 1700
%p 4000
%n 700
%k 450
%a 1700
%o 1500
BW [ \t\(]
EW [ \t.,;!\?$\)]
%option noyywrap
%%

%{
    void plastc();
%}

@[Bb]egin(.*)		|
".so ".*$			printf("%s", yytext);
{BW}send			printf("%ct'row",yytext[0]);
program+			printf("honky code");
[Uu]nix				printf("slow mo-fo");
UNIX				printf("dat slow mo-fo");
actual				printf("ak'shul");
{BW}take			printf("%csnatch",yytext[0]);
{BW}took		|
{BW}take[ns]			printf("%csnatch'd",yytext[0]);
[Mm]exican			printf("%cet-back", caseify('w'));
[Ii]talian			printf("%creaser", caseify('g'));
{BW}big{EW}		{	printf("%cbig ass",yytext[0]);plastc();}
fool				printf("honkyfool");
modem				printf("doodad");
{BW}he{EW}		{	printf("%cmah' man he",yytext[0]);plastc();}
"e the"{EW}		|
"a the"{EW}		|
"t the"{EW}		|
"d the"{EW}		{	printf("%c da damn", yytext[0]);plastc();}
wife			|
woman				printf("mama");
girl				printf("goat");
something			printf("sump'n");
{BW}lie				printf("%chonky jive",yytext[0]);
-o-                     	printf("-on rebound-");
[a-z]"."		{	printf("%s", yytext);expletive();}
!                       	printf(".  Right On!");
[Ss]ure				printf("%cho'", yytext[0]);
get				printf("git");
"will have"{EW}		|
"will"{EW}		|
"got to"{EW}		{	printf("gots'ta");plastc();}
"I am"				printf("I's gots'ta be");
"aren't"		|
"am not"		|
"have not"		|
"is not"		|
"are not"			printf("ain't");
{BW}see{EW}		{	printf("%csee's",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}are{EW}		{	printf("%cis",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}hat{EW}		{	printf("%cfedora",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}shoe			printf("%ckicker",yytext[0]);
{BW}"have to"{EW}	|
{BW}has{EW}		{	printf("%cgots'ta",yytext[0]);plastc();}
have				printf("gots'");
{BW}go{EW}		|
{BW}"come over"{EW}	|
{BW}come{EW}            {       printf("%cmosey on down",yytext[0]);plastc();}
buy				printf("steal");
{BW}car{EW}             {	printf("%cwheels",yytext[0]);plastc();}
drive				printf("roll");
{BW}food			printf("%ccatfish an' colluhd greens",yytext[0]);
{BW}eat{EW}		{	printf("%cfeed da bud",yytext[0]);plastc();}
drink				printf("guzzle");
black			|
negro				printf("brother");
white 				printf("honky");
nigger				printf("gentleman");
nice				printf("supa' fine");
{BW}person			printf("%csucka'",yytext[0]);
[Pp]eople			printf("%cucka's", caseify('s'));
{BW}thing			thing(yytext[0]);
house{EW}		{	printf("crib");plastc();}
home				printf("plantation");
name				printf("dojigger");
{BW}path			printf("%calley",yytext[0]);
[Cc]omputer			printf("%clunker", yytext[0]);
or				printf("o'");
president			printf("super-dude");
"prime minister"		printf("prahm mistah");
government			printf("guv'ment");
knew				printf("knowed");
[Bb]ecause			printf("'%cuz", caseify('c'));
[Yy]our				printf("%co'", yytext[0]);
[Ff]our				printf("%coe", yytext[0]);
got				printf("gots");
young				printf("yung");
you				printf("ya'");
You				printf("You's");
first				printf("fust");
police				printf("honky pigs");
{BW}string			printf("%cchittlin'",yytext[0]);
{BW}read			printf("%ceyeball",yytext[0]);
write				printf("scribble");
think{EW}		{	printf("thin'");plastc();}
with				printf("wif");
other				printf("uthu'");
[Tt]hr				printf("%c'r", yytext[0]);
[Tt]h				printf("%c", caseify('d'));
ing				printf("in'");
{BW}a{EW}		{	printf("%csome",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}to{EW}		{	printf("%ct'",yytext[0]);
				if(yytext[yyleng-1]!=' ')
					plastc();
			}
tion				printf("shun");
[Aa]lmost			printf("%cos'", caseify('m'));
from				printf("fum");
[Yy]"ou're"			printf("%couse", yytext[0]);
alright			|
okay				printf("coo'");
[Aa]nd				printf("%cn'", yytext[0]);
known				printf("knode");
want				printf("wants'");
beat				printf("whup'ed");
ile				printf("ah'l");
er{EW}			{	printf("uh");plastc();}
[a-z]sti			printf("%cs'i", yytext[0]);
tute				printf("toot");
exp				printf("'sp");
exs			|
exc				printf("'s");
{BW}ex				printf("%c'es",yytext[0]);
[ae]ct{EW}		{	printf("%cc'", yytext[0]); plastc(); }
like				printf("likes");
done			|
did				printf("dun did");
"kind of"			printf("kind'a");
women				printf("honky chicks");
{BW}man{EW}		{	printf("%cdude",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}men{EW}		|
{BW}mens{EW}		{	printf("%cdudes",yytext[0]);plastc();}
injured				printf("hosed");
killed			|
dead				printf("wasted");
good				printf("baaaad");
open{EW}		{	printf("jimmey");plastc();}
opened{EW}		{	printf("jimmey'd");plastc();}
{BW}very			printf("%creal",yytext[0]);
per				printf("puh'");
oar				printf("o'");
{BW}can				printf("%ckin",yytext[0]);
{BW}just{EW}		{	printf("%cplum",yytext[0]);plastc();}
[Dd]etroit			printf("Mo-town");
[Ww]"estern "[Ee]"lectric"	printf("da' cave");
{BW}believe			printf("%crecon'",yytext[0]);
[Ii]"ndianapolis"		printf("Nap-town");
Daniel			|
Dan				printf("Liva' Lips");
Reagan				printf("Kingfish");
Ronald{EW}		|
Ron{EW}			{	printf("Rolo");plastc();}
John				printf("Rastus");
Jim				printf("Bo-Jangles");
pontiff			|
pope				printf("wiz'");
[Pp]ravda			printf("dat commie rag");
broken				printf("bugger'd");
strange{EW}		{	printf("funky");plastc();}
dance{EW}		{	printf("boogy");plastc();}
ask				printf("ax'");
{BW}so{EW}		{	printf("%cso's",yytext[0]);plastc();}
heard				printf("'hoid");
head				printf("'haid");
boss				printf("main man");
money				printf("bre'd");
[a-z]":"		{	*(yytext+1) = ',';
				printf("%s dig dis:",yytext);
			}
amateur				printf("begina'");
radio				printf("transista'");
{BW}of{EW}		{	printf("%cuh",yytext[0]);plastc();}
which			|
what				printf("whut");
"don't"				printf("doan'");
does				printf("duz");
{BW}was{EW}		|
{BW}were{EW}		{	printf("%cwuz",yytext[0]);plastc();}
{BW}understand			printf("%cdig",yytext[0]);
{BW}my				printf("%cmah'",yytext[0]);
again			|
against				printf("agin'");
{BW}[Ii]{EW}		{	printf("%cah'",yytext[0]);plastc();}
meta				printf("meta-fuckin'");
cally				printf("c'l");
%%

void plastc()
{
    unput(yytext[yyleng-1]);
}

caseify(c)
char c;
{
	if (yytext[0] <= 'Z')
		return (c - ' ');
	else
		return (c);
}

thing(c)
char c;
{
	static short	count = 0;

	putchar(c);
	switch (count++ % 4) {
		case 0: case 2:
			printf("thang");
			break;
		case 1:
			printf("doohickey");
			break;
		case 3:
			printf("wahtahmellun");
			break;
		}
}
expletive()
{
	static short	count = 0;
	static short	which = 0;

	if (count++ % 4 == 0) {
		switch (which++ % 5) {
			case 0: printf("  What it is, Mama!"); break;
			case 1: printf("  Ya' know?"); break;
			case 2: printf("  Sheeeiit."); break;
			case 3: printf("  Ya' dig?"); break;
			case 4: printf("  Git down!"); break;
			}
		}
}

/*
 * Bugs:
 *
 * If a sentence starts with a keyword it doan' get converted, or:
 * it do, but gets a leading space
 */
Commit	Line	Data
dc17484a	1	%{
	2	/*
	3	* Lex filter to transform plain English into Jive English.
	4	* No racial or societal slurs are intended. For amusement only.
	5	*
	6	* Copyright 1986 by Daniel Klein and Clement Cole.
	7	*
	8	* Reproduction permitted so long as this notice is retained.
	9	*/
7f4e9d5e	10
dc17484a	11	%}
	12	%e 1700
	13	%p 4000
	14	%n 700
	15	%k 450
	16	%a 1700
	17	%o 1500
	18	BW [ \t\(]
	19	EW [ \t.,;!\?$\)]
ff7b4674	20	%option noyywrap
dc17484a	21	%%
ff7b4674	22
fb5da53f	23	%{
ff7b4674	24	void plastc();
fb5da53f	25	%}
ff7b4674	26
dc17484a	27	@[Bb]egin(.*) \|
	28	".so ".*$ printf("%s", yytext);
	29	{BW}send printf("%ct'row",yytext[0]);
	30	program+ printf("honky code");
	31	[Uu]nix printf("slow mo-fo");
	32	UNIX printf("dat slow mo-fo");
	33	actual printf("ak'shul");
	34	{BW}take printf("%csnatch",yytext[0]);
	35	{BW}took \|
	36	{BW}take[ns] printf("%csnatch'd",yytext[0]);
	37	[Mm]exican printf("%cet-back", caseify('w'));
	38	[Ii]talian printf("%creaser", caseify('g'));
	39	{BW}big{EW} { printf("%cbig ass",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	40	fool printf("honkyfool");
	41	modem printf("doodad");
	42	{BW}he{EW} { printf("%cmah' man he",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	43	"e the"{EW} \|
	44	"a the"{EW} \|
	45	"t the"{EW} \|
	46	"d the"{EW} { printf("%c da damn", yytext[0]);plastc();}
	47	wife \|
	48	woman printf("mama");
	49	girl printf("goat");
	50	something printf("sump'n");
	51	{BW}lie printf("%chonky jive",yytext[0]);
	52	-o- printf("-on rebound-");
	53	[a-z]"." { printf("%s", yytext);expletive();}
	54	! printf(". Right On!");
	55	[Ss]ure printf("%cho'", yytext[0]);
	56	get printf("git");
	57	"will have"{EW} \|
	58	"will"{EW} \|
	59	"got to"{EW} { printf("gots'ta");plastc();}
	60	"I am" printf("I's gots'ta be");
	61	"aren't" \|
	62	"am not" \|
	63	"have not" \|
	64	"is not" \|
	65	"are not" printf("ain't");
	66	{BW}see{EW} { printf("%csee's",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	67	{BW}are{EW} { printf("%cis",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	68	{BW}hat{EW} { printf("%cfedora",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	69	{BW}shoe printf("%ckicker",yytext[0]);
	70	{BW}"have to"{EW} \|
	71	{BW}has{EW} { printf("%cgots'ta",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	72	have printf("gots'");
	73	{BW}go{EW} \|
	74	{BW}"come over"{EW} \|
	75	{BW}come{EW} { printf("%cmosey on down",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	76	buy printf("steal");
	77	{BW}car{EW} { printf("%cwheels",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	78	drive printf("roll");
	79	{BW}food printf("%ccatfish an' colluhd greens",yytext[0]);
	80	{BW}eat{EW} { printf("%cfeed da bud",yytext[0]);plastc();}
	81	drink printf("guzzle");
	82	black \|
	83	negro printf("brother");
	84	white printf("honky");
	85	nigger printf("gentleman");
	86	nice printf("supa' fine");
	87	{BW}person printf("%csucka'",yytext[0]);
	88	[Pp]eople printf("%cucka's", caseify('s'));
	89	{BW}thing thing(yytext[0]);
	90	house{EW} { printf("crib");plastc();}
91	home printf("plantation");
92	name printf("dojigger");
93	{BW}path printf("%calley",yytext[0]);
94	[Cc]omputer printf("%clunker", yytext[0]);
95	or printf("o'");
96	president printf("super-dude");
97	"prime minister" printf("prahm mistah");
98	government printf("guv'ment");
99	knew printf("knowed");
100	[Bb]ecause printf("'%cuz", caseify('c'));
101	[Yy]our printf("%co'", yytext[0]);
102	[Ff]our printf("%coe", yytext[0]);
103	got printf("gots");
104	young printf("yung");
105	you printf("ya'");
106	You printf("You's");
107	first printf("fust");
108	police printf("honky pigs");
109	{BW}string printf("%cchittlin'",yytext[0]);
110	{BW}read printf("%ceyeball",yytext[0]);
111	write printf("scribble");
112	think{EW} { printf("thin'");plastc();}
113	with printf("wif");
114	other printf("uthu'");
115	[Tt]hr printf("%c'r", yytext[0]);
116	[Tt]h printf("%c", caseify('d'));
117	ing printf("in'");
118	{BW}a{EW} { printf("%csome",yytext[0]);plastc();}
119	{BW}to{EW} { printf("%ct'",yytext[0]);
120	if(yytext[yyleng-1]!=' ')
121	plastc();
122	}
123	tion printf("shun");
124	[Aa]lmost printf("%cos'", caseify('m'));
125	from printf("fum");
126	[Yy]"ou're" printf("%couse", yytext[0]);
127	alright \|
128	okay printf("coo'");
129	[Aa]nd printf("%cn'", yytext[0]);
130	known printf("knode");
131	want printf("wants'");
132	beat printf("whup'ed");
133	ile printf("ah'l");
134	er{EW} { printf("uh");plastc();}
135	[a-z]sti printf("%cs'i", yytext[0]);
136	tute printf("toot");
137	exp printf("'sp");
138	exs \|
139	exc printf("'s");
140	{BW}ex printf("%c'es",yytext[0]);
141	[ae]ct{EW} { printf("%cc'", yytext[0]); plastc(); }
142	like printf("likes");
143	done \|
144	did printf("dun did");
145	"kind of" printf("kind'a");
146	women printf("honky chicks");
147	{BW}man{EW} { printf("%cdude",yytext[0]);plastc();}
148	{BW}men{EW} \|
149	{BW}mens{EW} { printf("%cdudes",yytext[0]);plastc();}
150	injured printf("hosed");
151	killed \|
152	dead printf("wasted");
153	good printf("baaaad");
154	open{EW} { printf("jimmey");plastc();}
155	opened{EW} { printf("jimmey'd");plastc();}
156	{BW}very printf("%creal",yytext[0]);
157	per printf("puh'");
158	oar printf("o'");
159	{BW}can printf("%ckin",yytext[0]);
160	{BW}just{EW} { printf("%cplum",yytext[0]);plastc();}
161	[Dd]etroit printf("Mo-town");
162	[Ww]"estern "[Ee]"lectric" printf("da' cave");
163	{BW}believe printf("%crecon'",yytext[0]);
164	[Ii]"ndianapolis" printf("Nap-town");
165	Daniel \|
166	Dan printf("Liva' Lips");
167	Reagan printf("Kingfish");
168	Ronald{EW} \|
169	Ron{EW} { printf("Rolo");plastc();}
170	John printf("Rastus");
171	Jim printf("Bo-Jangles");
172	pontiff \|
173	pope printf("wiz'");
174	[Pp]ravda printf("dat commie rag");
175	broken printf("bugger'd");
176	strange{EW} { printf("funky");plastc();}
177	dance{EW} { printf("boogy");plastc();}
178	ask printf("ax'");
179	{BW}so{EW} { printf("%cso's",yytext[0]);plastc();}
180	heard printf("'hoid");
181	head printf("'haid");
182	boss printf("main man");
183	money printf("bre'd");
184	[a-z]":" { *(yytext+1) = ',';
185	printf("%s dig dis:",yytext);
186	}
187	amateur printf("begina'");
188	radio printf("transista'");
189	{BW}of{EW} { printf("%cuh",yytext[0]);plastc();}
190	which \|
191	what printf("whut");
192	"don't" printf("doan'");
193	does printf("duz");
194	{BW}was{EW} \|
195	{BW}were{EW} { printf("%cwuz",yytext[0]);plastc();}
196	{BW}understand printf("%cdig",yytext[0]);
197	{BW}my printf("%cmah'",yytext[0]);
198	again \|
199	against printf("agin'");
200	{BW}[Ii]{EW} { printf("%cah'",yytext[0]);plastc();}
201	meta printf("meta-fuckin'");
202	cally printf("c'l");
203	%%
dc17484a	204
ff7b4674 JH	205	void plastc()
	206	{
	207	unput(yytext[yyleng-1]);
	208	}
	209
dc17484a	210	caseify(c)
	211	char c;
	212	{
	213	if (yytext[0] <= 'Z')
	214	return (c - ' ');
	215	else
	216	return (c);
	217	}
	218
	219	thing(c)
	220	char c;
	221	{
	222	static short count = 0;
	223
	224	putchar(c);
	225	switch (count++ % 4) {
	226	case 0: case 2:
	227	printf("thang");
	228	break;
	229	case 1:
	230	printf("doohickey");
	231	break;
	232	case 3:
	233	printf("wahtahmellun");
	234	break;
	235	}
	236	}
	237	expletive()
	238	{
	239	static short count = 0;
	240	static short which = 0;
	241
	242	if (count++ % 4 == 0) {
	243	switch (which++ % 5) {
	244	case 0: printf(" What it is, Mama!"); break;
	245	case 1: printf(" Ya' know?"); break;
	246	case 2: printf(" Sheeeiit."); break;
	247	case 3: printf(" Ya' dig?"); break;
	248	case 4: printf(" Git down!"); break;
	249	}
	250	}
	251	}
	252
	253	/*
	254	* Bugs:
	255	*
	256	* If a sentence starts with a keyword it doan' get converted, or:
	257	* it do, but gets a leading space
	258	*/